


Falling

by Twisted_Magic



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Amnesia, Angst, Fallen Angel Castiel (Supernatural), I watched the series finale and i looked away back to simpler times, M/M, Memory Loss, POV Castiel (Supernatural)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-21
Updated: 2020-11-21
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:40:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,133
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27650792
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Twisted_Magic/pseuds/Twisted_Magic
Summary: Castiel Falls after working against the angels, but Dean is there for him.Even when Castiel doesn't remember who he is.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Kudos: 16





	Falling

**Author's Note:**

> So, I found this in my old files a little while ago and decided to post it after the show ended. I stopped watching the show during Season 5 (only returning to watch that hilariously bland series finale) and I barely remember those seasons, so I'm just going to have to trust my 15-year-old self in that this story is at least semi logical. 
> 
> I hope you enjoy, and RIP to the show and its fans!

Castiel is falling.

Wind rages around Castiel, whipping his wings against him, feathers slapping him in the face and wrapping around him as he tumbles through the air. As Castiel spins, he can catch glimpses of the glowing white light that spills through the rip in Heaven he made when he fell.

Earth is barreling towards him, and as his doom approaches, Castiel’s wings begin to fall away; feathers are fluttering off into the sky, and his beautiful wings are being ripped away from him. His wing feathers turn black as they leave his body. Within moments, he is trapped in a spiral of black, unable to see the doom that awaits him.

_What have I done?_

🜁🜁🜁

“Cas?” 

_I would know that voice anywhere._

Castiel opens his eyes and sees a shadowy figure leaning over him. The figure makes a dark blot in a starry night sky, though a pale light glows around the figure’s edges from behind.

_That’s my Grace._

Castiel blinks, and the figure’s face comes into focus in the gleaming light.

“Dean!” 

Cas is gripped with a sudden urgency as he remembers his Fall. He grabs Dean’s shirt and pulls him down close as he stares with wide eyes.

“Whoa, calm down, Cas.” Dean searches Castiel’s face with evident worry as he gently tries to pull Castiel’s hands off his shirt with no success. 

“What are you doing on the side of the road in a crater?”

“My-my father!” Cas gasps, gripping Dean’s shirt as tight as fear is now gripping himself. “He-he knew that I had been working against the other angels to help him and he-he said I was selfish. I-I Fell, Dean!” 

A questioning look comes across Dean’s face. 

_Why don’t you get it? You must know!_

“Don’t you understand, he banished me! He’ll never forgive me and it’s…all…my fault…”

Castiel finds himself becoming dizzy, and weak. His hands slip from Dean’s shirt.

Before Castiel can feel the touch of Dean’s hand that is reaching towards his face, darkness overwhelms him.

🜃🜃🜃

He blinks open his eyes to find himself in a comfy bed. He looks around himself and sees that he’s in a room with a couch on his right with a man sleeping on it. On his left is another bed and a man is sitting on it facing him, his head resting in his hands. 

_Where am I?_

“What am I doing here?” he mutters to the man on his left. The man looks up instantly and an expression of relief floods his features.

“Cas!” the man gasps. “You’re okay!”

“Who is Cas? And who are you?” he replies with a confused frown. 

_Am_ I _Cas?_ Shock suddenly races through him. _I don’t know my own name! Who am I?_

The other man’s expression is replaced by dread.

“Oh no, you’re already starting to lose your memories.”

“What’s happening?” Cas asks. The other man leans forward slowly as Cas sits up in bed. The other man grips the back of his own neck with his left hand anxiously.

“You-your name is Castiel,” he starts slowly, “and I’m Dean Winchester. Does that ring any bells?” Cas frowns in confusion.

“I do not hear any bells,” he replies. Dean closes his eyes and takes a deep breath before looking at him again.

“Cas, you’re an angel of God.” Dean looks at him expectantly. Castiel raises his eyebrows.

“I am an angel?” he asks in wonder. He looks behind himself for wings, and sees nothing. “What are you talking about?”

“Well, you aren’t technically an angel anymore,” Dean says carefully, as if he thinks the next part will be hard to take. “You Fell from Grace, you lost your wings. I found you on the side of the road as we were driving to a motel. You were…” Dean pauses for a moment to choose the right words. “You were pretty freaked out. You told me God threw you out of Heaven because you had helped us to fight against the other angels, years ago.” 

These news consume Cas’ thoughts as he tries to make sense of them. Then, confusion and fear fill his chest in response to what this strange man is telling him.

“I-I don’t understand,” Castiel mutters, looking down at his hands. “How am I an angel? How could I have forgotten who I am? How could I have met you before and _forgotten you_?”

Those last words make Dean suck in a mouthful of air like he has been hurt, like those words are exactly what he was thinking himself.

“Well, when an angel falls from Grace,” Dean begins explaining carefully, “they slowly start to lose their memories as they become more and more human. But you must have lost yours all at once because you were so valuable to God and He considered your memories to be too dangerous to keep.”

Cas suddenly hears a rustling behind himself and he turns around. The man who was sleeping on the couch is waking up.

“Hey Cas,” the man yawns in greeting. Dean clears his throat.

“Cas, this is Sam, my brother.” 

That comment makes Sam sit up immediately, now clearly wide awake.

“Have you lost your memories already?” Sam asks with deep concern etched into his voice. 

_Should I know him too?_

“How could I have forgotten _everything_? I don’t know what to think,” Castiel whispers to himself as he looks down at his hands clasped in his lap. Dean takes a deep breath.

“Well, we can reteach you everything that you’ve forgotten,” Dean reassures. “It’s just remembering who you are that might be a problem, knowing how to act like yourself and who to be.”

“But,” Dean continues in a more confident tone, “maybe starting over won’t be so bad. It will be tough though, so you’ll have to ask yourself: who do you want to be, Cas?” Dean looks at Castiel with a searching stare, and Castiel feels it means something more; like Dean is asking him a silent question that Castiel has the feeling he should know the answer to already. 

Sam doesn’t notice, however, and he interjects into the conversation before Castiel can think of an answer.

“So Cas, are you going to go on your own, or are you going to help us fight demons?”

_Fight demons? I don’t know about that, but Dean seems like he was special to me before I lost my memory. Maybe I can recreate myself with him and Sam._

“I choose you,” Cas answers as he looks back at Dean, and he watches as Dean grins. When he sees Dean’s determined smile, like Dean just knows he can fix him, Cas can’t fight the feeling that he is falling again, but in a different and possibly good way.

Castiel is falling.


End file.
